The Fight. The Struggle. The Love.

It’s been about 3 years since I last posted on my blog. Going to pick it up again. Why? A few things.

1. I love writing. I have always written. My last solo show was based on specific poems that I wrote between 1995-2022. I also finished my first novel 1.5 years ago and have been pitching to literary agents.

2. It is a great way to process. I read a ton. I journal, take notes, and also mentor artists around the globe. Writing here will wonderfully combine sharing my thoughts about all the above.

3. I have an exhibition coming up, opening on May 25th here in Waco, Texas, at our local museum. (Art Center Waco). I don’t think I can put down in words, like Elton John, how excited I am. But having a show in your town adds a ton of pressure to perform on additional levels. The exhibition is a 2 person show with one of my besties, Vy Ngo, a fabulous artist out of Austin, TX. This will be our second exhibition together, but on an entirely new level! 

I actually cleaned the studio last week:)

I wrapped up a solo exhibition at the end of January at Vaughn Gallery (Austin) and took a little soul care break after 5-6 months of intense studio time creating work for the show. Getting started again was really difficult. I always want to live in moments of growth or evolution in my work. As the incredible book Art and Fear states, “The function of the overwhelming majority of your work is simply to teach yourself how to make the small fraction of work that soars.” And “Leave a loose thread, unresolved issues, to explore in the next work.”

I follow those two rules with a reckless abandon. This also makes the process at time full of chaos and loss. But like Friedrich Nietzsche says, “One must still have chaos in oneself to be able to give birth to a dancing star.” And so I live in the chaos while I create. Here are a few things I wrote on my Instagram posts the last few weeks that show me in those moments of struggle. 

A lot of experimenting and evolution trying to take place.

March 22

So many thoughts, ideas, mess ups, start overs, good moments covered by bad moments then covered by another moment….this is the way:)

March 29th

Some days….you want to throw in the towel. This week I have scrapped 8 pieces. Meaning, I have painted over them multiple (at least 4/5) times. I know I will find where I am going. That’s what time is for. I mean, I just painted 32 paintings this week, but only 8 newly started pieces exist. So, you want to be an artist? This is the way.

March 30th

Progress. Man, what a hard week. Fought through, didn’t give up. Pushed, yelled, cried, got dominated by vision and knocked out by techniques and experiments. By the end of today and a lot of hours I feel pretty good about where things are going. Time to take a few days off for soul care with a close friend! But next week the monster comes back! Haha!Progress. Man, what a hard week. Fought through, didn’t give up. Pushed, yelled, cried, got dominated by vision and knocked out by techniques and experiments. By the end of today and a lot of hours I feel pretty good about where things are going. Time to take a few days off for soul care with a close friend! But next week the monster comes back! Haha!

April 5th

The most spiritual place I know. For me, painting is prayer. Alone. Silent. Intimate. 

If you are just discovering my work, you can follow me on Instagram at @tynathanclark

LIVE STUDIO DISCUSSION WITH APU ART DEPARTMENT.

This Friday July 10th from 6:30pm-8pm PST I will be live with the APU Art Dept. (where I went to art school and played basketball, I know- weird combination) You have been invited to join in and watch if you like. I will be broadcasting from my studio in Waco, TX. On literally the last day in my studio, as I am currently in the middle of moving and will be moving my entire studio, again, to another location. 

I will be discussing my journey in the art world, my current work that is revolving around music, the life of an artist (because it is not glamorous as many believe, but one full of fun and adventure), life as an artist during Covid and what could be in store in the post-Covid art-world.

I am really excited for the conversation and to get to speak with and discuss a lot more with a group of art majors and MFA students, I hope you will join us Friday night! 

Here is the link and info. Friday July, 10th 6:30pm-8pm PST

Link to Zoom

Meeting ID: 813 2865 1557
Password: 4Bz94v

The struggle is real for an artist.

IAMA MESS, but IAMOK, THANKS.

The struggle is real for an artist. We are often a complete mess internally. We are mostly alone creating and spending the majority of our time with our own thoughts. I received this questions from one of my closest artist friends the other day. She asked,

“We all go through phases of elation then deep doubt and questioning. What do you do to get out of the later?”

There is a troubling feeling that we share as artists, no matter how young or old we are. This feeling is as if we are all alone in the world and can’t quite find out how to exist in a space that is undefined. This space is called the art world, and the art world itself will provide no answers to you as an artist, it just exists and if you are lucky, you get to play within it. There are no rules, only suggestions, there is no road map because everyone’s is different, you are the one that makes your journey into the world. For some of us it is handed to us on a golden spoon for whatever mysterious reason, and for most of us we have to bust our asses, go broke, lose our minds, cry a lot, paint with scraps, eat less and make a whole shit load of art! 

I think I hit a low point today. Like a seriously low point. Here is the reality. Art is fucking hard. If you didn’t hear me the first time, Art is fucking hard. It is literally the most difficult thing that I have ever done, and I have done many, many things over the years. It seemed as if 2019 was going to be the year where everything comes together and emergence becomes a notable fact. But on the heels of two solo exhibitions where not a single piece has sold, the mental fatigue begins to attack the heart and then the heart attacks the soul and it becomes difficult to even breath at times. 

Work from one of the shows.

I don’t lack confidence. I don’t lack work ethic. I don’t lack in study. I know that my work in both shows was strong, not every single piece, because that is almost impossible. But most of the work was really strong, and I continued to grow in my craft with each piece, each body of work, in a way that I can feel very proud of. One of the shows was a blast and unluckily the work just may not have been a good fit for the clientele, that happens, that is a part of testing the water in the art game. The other show should have sold multiple pieces, again nothing. I knew it was a risk and it fell flat on its face. Lesson learned. It’s not that my work doesn’t sell, it does. I have collectors all over the US that own multiple pieces of mine. I even have a piece that sits next to a Rauschenberg in someone’s home! The hard part about art is we have to try every avenue that comes our way, hoping that one of them is the next step or the next meal. When it turns up short, then we the questions sink in…

Back to my friends question. 

“We all go through phases of elation then deep doubt and questioning. What do you do to get out of the later?”

I have done a lot of doubting in the last few months, not with my work. I know my work is strong and continuing to grow. I have been doubting the journey, the road, the trail, the process, the patience, the self. It is hard for someone to truly understand the emotions and mental/physical energy that goes into creating a large body of work. In my last series I worked 12-14 hour days painting and sewing and framing and stretching for a couple months and this was on the heels of the series prior spending a couple months working the same hours.

Working on art like this is the most joyous feeling that I reach inside, it is worshipful, spiritual, like a symphony playing at the top of a mountain with the sound reigning down on the towns below, it is magical! Once the work is finished, we crash, our spirit drops as the momentum comes to a halt. That opening for the show brings the energy into that second wind, the excitement of seeing your work on a wall amongst its peers while people gather to discuss and become involved with the pieces, this is what I live for. Then when disappointment follows, disappointment that is out of your control and in the hands of others, this is the really difficult part for an artist. The doubting, the questioning, the whirlpool of thoughts that my friend Steven Pressfield would call “The Resistance”, begins to creep in and set its foundations, and you know that you don’t have much time to wallow because you need to be back in the studio painting as fast as you can, because you need it and it needs you!

Shit. Three weeks just flew by and “The Resistance” has been winning. The only way to get out of the doubt and the questioning is to work, using my hands, getting on my knees, drawing lines and making marks and washing colors in pastel dust and cloth. 

Today, in the studio, physically and emotionally exhausted.

So, I have been in my studio the last few days grinding away at a new series that I am going to title, 

“I am a mess, but I am ok. Thanks.”

I read a quote this week from Chuck Close.

“ Inspiration is for Amateurs- the rest of us just show up and get to work.” I talked to my artist friend about this. It would be easy to say, “just find some inspiration to get you through, to get you moving.”

Well,  If you are always waiting for inspiration then you will never be a great artist. Inspiration comes in unexpected moments and they are a million times fewer than the days that we need to work in the studio.

Another quote for my week is from the ever amazing Mark Bradford, he says

“I work when I am sick, happy, depressed, constipated, jet-lagged. I show up.”

Yep, Mark, I agree and damn it is difficult. If we are not able to work these things out with time working in the studio, then why are we doing this? Why are we even trying? 

One more quote than I am done.

“The most important tool the artist fashions through constant practice is faith in his ability to produce miracles when they are needed.” Mark Rothko

Maybe sometime that miracle is simply pouring that coffee at 6am in the morning and heading straight into the studio to see what other tiny miracles show up in the day.

Today, I hit a low point. Discouraged. Upset. Quick to anger. Frustrated. Sad. I am a mess, but honestly I am ok.

-Ty

7/17/2019 9:28pm

Back to School!

Ok. It has been a while since I posted to my blog. A little over year, one year and three months to be exact! In that time a lot has happened and is continuing to happen. The latest life movement involves me going back to school.

My Senior Art Show at Azusa Pacific University Circa 1999 the last time I was in school!

I was recently invited to take part in a year long program through Fuller Seminary’s: Brehm Center , their graduate school of Theology and the Arts. This course is an invite only post-grad course, for 5 artists from across the US including myself. The course is an intensive 9 month mentorship program and is titled "The Culture Care Art Practitioner Cohort". 

Culture Care is a thesis by artist Makoto Fujimura for the thoughtful stewardship of culture that seeks to bring theological, spiritual, and cultural formation through the arts. The course will be directed by Makoto Fujimura himself, a world renown abstract expressionist artist and Chair of the Brehm Center. Makoto was a presidential appointee to the National Endowment of the Arts from 2003-2009, has shown his work around the world, authored multiple books and assisted Martin Scorsese on his film Silence.

Makoto Fujimura discussing his work.

Fujimura believes that a healthy and thriving culture is impossible without the participation of artists and other leaders who are educated intellectually, trained experientially, formed spiritually and growing morally. Beauty is both a goal and a catalyst for each of these elements….a well-nurtured culture becomes an environment in which people and creativity thrive. Artists at their best help humanity with life questions by presenting an extensive view of life that reveals beauty in broad depths with an incredible opportunity to care for culture so future generations can thrive. (that's where I come in!)

The purpose of the program is for us to learn how to deepen our calling as artists in today's culture, using our work as a gift that can influence, inspire and gain traction in today's divisive and corroding community that exists within our own ecosystems. As I continue to expand my reach in the art world by showing at galleries around the country, speaking/lecturing at schools, galleries, conferences or art foundations this education will continue to build into my knowledge base and network for being a steward of Culture Care.

Working in my studio.

During the course we will be studying through an intensive digital curriculum that includes literature, writing of essays, creating art in different mediums, collaborative interaction as well as individual mentoring from Makoto and multiple gatherings across the US from Pasadena to Princeton.

It is an honor to have been chosen as 1 of 5 artists from around the world to take part in this course. Part of the course is for each of us to find patrons to support us. The cost of the course is estimated at $5,000 which includes $3,000 for the program, airfare/transportation to our course gatherings from Pasadena to Princeton, and the cost of materials. The word "patron" derives from the Latin: patronus ("patron"), one who gives benefits to his clients. Patronage is the support, encouragement, privilege, or financial aid that an organization or individual bestows to another. In the history of art, arts patronage refers to the support that kings, popes, and the wealthy have provided to artists such as musicians, painters, and sculptors.

I would love for you to be my patron.

Fujimura envisions ‘Culture Care’ as any activity that provides ‘care for our culture’s “soul” . . . so that reminders of beauty—both ephemeral and enduring—are present in even the harshest environments.’ The defining characteristic of this kind of care is generativity—one might also say fruitfulness or the potential to catalyse further beauty, goodness, and flourishing. He proceeds to explore and define the concept of generativity through three G’s: genesis moments, generosity, and generational thinking. The three G’s characterize generativity because they point to a reality where freshness and growth are potential in every moment, where life and creativity are gratuitous gifts that we must steward and share, and where we can create work that endures for future generations through conversations with the past.

Your Patronage and generosity is a way to support my ability to take part in the course. I have created a way to return the love for those of you who decide to become a patron of my continuing education in the arts! This is a great way as well to get some art at a lower cost:)

$100 – 6x8” work of art on paper

$200– 8x12” work of art on paper

$400 –16x20” work of art on paper

$500 – 22x30” work of art on paper

$1000- 24x32” work of art on canvas

$1500- 28x36” work of art on canvas

*The original paintings will be created over the course of the 9 month program.

Recent studies on paper using vintage book pages with acrylic and graphite on paper.

If you feel led to give more, we can discuss a work of art to match your financial contribution.

If you have any further questions, feel free to ask, I would love to answer them!

Much Love,
Ty Nathan Clark